"You have to stop doing that," you said.
I lost my next breath and my world stopped.
"Throwing things out of proportion," you'd say.
But no, I'm just letting out my frustration.
What you do not seem to understand time and time again
is that my life for the last year has been about you (don't go branching off now).
Hanging out with you constantly, not going or going somewhere
in preference just to be with you. My "friend"?
Umm I'm beginning to think not.
OR MAYBE, I'm not the friend.
Who knows?
Ugh.. I get a knot in my throat to keep tears from flowing.
I do not know what you want.
No, I think I have an idea, but you'd say I'm wrong.
I WILL start doing things without you.
I WILL get on.
I WILL NOT cry everyday.
I WILL NOT try to tell you how I feel.
I WILL NOT go to you in my time of sorrow.
I WILL NOT ask for to much.
I WILL, however, be here when you need me (if you decide I'm worthy enough).
I WILL NOT tell you that I am angry (i'm sorry if it shows).
I WILL refrain from asking you questions (sorry if I slip, it's out of habit).
I WILL try to break my habits and comfort zones when it comes to you.
eventually, they WILL be broken.
AND BEHIND THE CLOSED DOORS...

I WILL CRY
I WILL BE ANGRY
I WILL BE SAD
I WILL FEEL ENRAGED
I WILL MISS YOU
I WILL MISS WHO I WAS WHEN I WAS WITH YOU
I WILL WANT TO ASK YOU QUESTIONS
I WILL WANT TO KNOW OF YOUR LIFE
I WILL WANT TO DO EVERYTHING WITH YOU
but... in front of you..
I will be the person you want me to be.